So..... I kind of had a breakdown

So yes I know it's been way to long since I have posted. And yes I am so sorry for this. I kind of had myself a little bit of a mental breakdown, and needed to step away for a short time. I am still doing good and am trying hard to make good decisions. But I needed a break. So what brought all of this on you may ask. Well.................

So on Monday of last week, the 15th I met with Dr. Joe for my mid three week phase 3 visit. I had been weighing at home all week and my weight wasn't really dropping but going up and plateauing. Little did I know from carrying my scale to work during the week, somehow I had messed it up and had actually lost a tiny bit of weight. So frustrating. This prompted Dr. Joe to tell me he felt I needed to do phase 2 again at the end of the 3 weeks. I told him OK, and I would be willing to do this.

But inside I was cringing and getting upset and not happy at all about having to go through phase 2 again for another 41 days of not eating anything that I like, especially when I was so close to phase 4 the DNA based eating. So I had a mental breakdown. I stepped away a bit and ate things that I had missed. But the nice thing was, I didn't go to wild and crazy. Yes I had pizza and Freddy's, and I enjoyed them but I really tried to stop when I got full. I took a week off from exercising and just really enjoyed a chance to eat the foods I missed, but not go to wild and crazy.

So what does all this mean? Well Dr. Joe checked on me midweek and I told him that I just needed a chance to step back, a break from the constant diet. I needed to have this mental breakdown. I told him that I would be ready to go on Friday and I was going to go into the next 41 days at full force. So on this Friday 8/26/16 I will be ready to go. I will be back on supplements and no breakfast. Back to eating the same things over and over again cause I am to picky of an eater. But I will do it and I will focus and we will get this thing done.

What does this mean for exercising? Not bad things at all. It means that we will be slightly modifying my phase 2 repeat diet so that I can still exercise. This to me is so important so that I can keep up the exercise. I want to so badly to succeed in this diet and I feel like I need to exercise as well. I am pleased to say that I have been able to wear flat shoes with very little issues, mainly just tired feet. But no back problems!! This is a celebration as to the last few years I had to wear tennis shoes and no cute shoes.

When I get done with the next 2 weeks, I will excitingly be 2 weeks away from Disney. I hope to be down to 250 by then and am so excited to get there and getting so close. I did gain weight this week, that I had taken off. Right now I am up 3.4lbs. It sucks but I know that I can work hard and get it back off. And I plan on working at it! So just if you get a chance say a quick prayer for me this Friday! I look forward to updating you every week like I had been before with the first phase 2. Who knows maybe we will see a drop of clothing side again!!!

So I will leave you now with a picture of me getting my gym on! LOL

Struggling but still going!

So as of Thursday we made it thru 6 weeks. It wasn't the easiest 6 weeks but we did it. My amazing and loving caring husband surprised me by having the most beautiful flowers delivered to work telling me how proud he was of me. I had been at work since 2 am and was so very tired so when they came I got all teary eyed and emotional.

So Friday was Day 1 of the next 3 weeks. I got to eat breakfast which is kind of weird now. I am so not used to eating before noon anymore. This also was the day I started exercising and worked out with a trainer for an hour. I wanted him to show me how to use the machines. Trainers are to expensive to use all the time. So I got what I needed and am going to continue on my own. Friday night was also the night I had waited 6 weeks for!!! Dr Joe gave me permission to have Mexican food! So we went to my all time favorite Mexican restaurant Chuy's. It was delicious! I got fajitas, so yummy and ate about 22 chips. I kept count. I had 2 more than I originally planned on. Chuy's salsa is my favorite and is made fresh daily so I got some to go to use with my taco salads at home.

So the Struggling part. I am glad so very glad I got to have Mexican night but this week since then has been a nightmare. I am not loosing weight this week, I have been gaining. I went from 264.6 Friday morning to 267.4 on Saturday and sadly its still been going up, I got up to 270.2 on Monday. Now today thankfully I have gone down to 269.2, I am thankful to be dropping again but this is beyond stressful. It makes you feel some what like you have failed. But I have been trying to remember that in this short time I have accomplished so much and that with God I can do anything! 

I am still working hard and keeping going but when you are working so hard everyday and it keeps going up like that it gets super overwhelming. I have literally worked out in some form everyday since Friday. Last night we went for walk and I walked the fastest I have in a long time and we did 1.42 miles. The best part is I kept up with Matt the entire time(which I never do) and my back didn't hurt at all! This was such an awesome feeling and just such a relief! 

So I have a funny to share from yesterday. I called to set up a time to get my dress altered for Mom's wedding and I need to make it as close to the date as possible to make sure it fits the best. So the lady said the latest I could do was August 29th. And I said OK, that works and she told me I was going to have to stop on that date. And I asked her what, and she said loosing weight. I was shocked for a moment and I said to her.... Lady I have 150 lbs to loose and I will not be stopping. If I stop now, I will probably not start up again. And that is just not an option. She said OK, but you could tell she wasn't happy with my response. This chick is on a mission and dress fitting 100% perfect is not going to stand between me and my goal of getting fit and healthy. 

Well, I am sure I will think of more to share. I go on Monday for my next weigh in, I look forward to sharing all the information with you all. Hope you have a great rest of the week! 

Faith, Love, Pixie Dust and Me! 

The Good and The Bad

Well we are literally down to the last 2 days, Today and tomorrow!! Yes, I am not done with the diet, but I get to move on to the next step. So 3 more weeks of very little excitement in food but I get to add exercise and breakfast! Wohoo!! It's hard for me to fathom that in just 40 days I lost 35lbs.

So lets start with the Good! I no longer have to take my supplements! This is a good thing cause I was taking them 3 times a day and trying to remember all of that just got old. I am still taking a multi-vitamin and vitamin B12 but they are chewables and once a day. Every night it's so weird to look at my pill box now, this diet this last month has been such a blessing. I only have my multi-vitamin, iron, vitamin D, and every other night my Omeprazole. Which I only have to take when I need it. Its so crazy to see how few medications I take now. My back has been improving more and more and I am feeling good. The best thing about my meeting with him this week is he said I can go for Mexican Friday night! Chuy's here I come! I am beyond excited for this! He also said I can add a small amount of fat free sour cream and a sprinkling of cheese to my taco salads at home now. The things I get excited for, LOL.

So the Bad of this diet. First its the lack of variety in food. I am so thankful to be so close to being done with this diet. But I have had a trail with this, the entire time. I also have struggled with not cheating. I have been doing amazing, maybe a few chips here and there but until this week I did awesome. I struggled so bad yesterday. The kiddos were eating pizza rolls and I ate 5 of them. I have never been more disappointed. But we are 100% back on it today and staying strong. I know there are going to be good and bad days and I refuse to let this get me down. Another thing that has been horrible about this diet and has caused my weight to fluctuate is constipation. I am not eating enough to go as often as I wish I could. So today since its been 3 days I went back up to 266.4 and had gotten down on Monday to 263.8. So today I show I have only lost 32. Nothing like a smack in the face, I know it will fluctuate but its so annoying.

Okay so I promised some before and after pics and here you go! Obviously the ones on the left are the day I started and ones on the right are yesterday. I can't begin to tell you all how happy I get when I see these. It makes me want to cry happy tears. Of course I didn't include the close up of my butt that my husband took last night. LOL, he is always such a kidder. So excited to share all of this with you! Hope you have a blessed week and look for my update next week after we start working out.

      ---- Faith, Trust, Pixie Dust, and Me